How to beat Spain BY Luiz Felipe Scolari (Parody)

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Dedication:

I would like to dedicate this “book” to all football managers and team coaches. I would like to specially dedicate is those managers and coaches that have endured continual thrashing in the hands of Barcelona and Spain. The tiki taka style of football has for years now denied coaches sleep and has made players unnecessarily anxious and scared

Acknolwdgement:

I would like to thank all the members of the Bayern Munich team and my Brazilian team without whom the writing of this book would have been impossible. I still feel the need to mention a few players whose contributions in one way or another have made the writing of this book and other subsequent ones (I believe that people will write) achievable.

First, I would like to thank the Bayern Munich team, who first demonstrated to the world that the very entertaining and attractive tiki taka football style is not an end-all and be-all. I would like to at this stage state that I don’t believe that the tiki taka style of football has lost its potency. The men from Tahiti will attest to its effectiveness. My point is this, if you press with aggression, move as a team, take shots whenever possible, hold your position and most importantly believe then tiki taka style of football can be beaten and judging by the score from all three matches (Barcelona v Bayern Munich (both legs) and Brazil v Spain) beaten very well.

Next, I would like to say a very special thank you to my main muscle men in the midfield- Paulinho and Luiz Gustavo who made sure that even when they missed the ball (which was very rare) they didn’t miss getting both the leg and the ball.

Big shout out to Oscar, who spent most of the first half of the game following Sergio Busquets around in the very deep areas of the midfield. He made sure that whenever Busquets received the ball he found it difficult to make a good pass or dribble often starting attacks very close to the goal. Well as much as I would like to take credit for this fantastic tactic I must confess that I copied it from my dear friend and fellow coach Jupp Heynckes (by the way thanks a lot mate ) who, put Mario Gomez and later Thomas Mueller on ‘PI’ duties on Busquets thereby removing him as an option to pass to. By sealing the source from which Iniesta, Mata and co are fed thereby starving the playmakers of the much needed ball.

Another big shout out to David Luiz for being able to switch from centre back to left back position, freeing Marcelo to occupy the wide midfield position. It worked like a charm Pedro was now stuck between attacking Luiz or Marcelo. In one of his (Pedro) confused states Luiz could now hit the pass to Hulk that created the first goal.

This acknowledgement would not be complete without mentioning the man I really owe some of this victory to. Stand up ALVARO ARBELOA. Thanks to your inability to keep possession and love for playing out of position we found great joy in strolling in and out of that very porous right back.

In conclusion, I would like to offer some questions to the Spanish national team and Barcelona.

-       What about going into a game with more than just a plan a? (I mean there are still 25 other letters of the alphabet after ‘a’ to pick from)

-       Can you rely on Xavi and Iniesta come the world cup next year?

-       What about fresh legs like Isco and Thiago Alcantara? Can they spice things up?

Till we see again in Brazil next year please reflect on the lessons of this book.

Extracts from “HOW TO BEAT SPAIN by Luiz Felipe Scolari (Parody)”

Till next time always stay TRUE 2 the beautiful game. Later…